Put the smack down...

Get mad, then get over it. ~Colin Powell

The last few days have been a flurry of activity, and an emotional rollercoaster. Offspring #2 had planned to leave for school last week, and roughly 5 hours into the sojourn, his plan changed. The reality of going to college in the city paled in comparison to the visual fantasy. When I received the “Mom, what do I do?” phone call, I said what every mother would have said, “Come home.”

The ensuing chaos is not because my son is now back home. It’s because he and his father signed a 10-month lease about 12 minutes before the change of heart. The leasing manager wasn’t at all understanding about the change in plans, or the anxiety attack that resulted, and she seemingly has no intention of breaking the lease or refunding any portion of the thousands of dollars involved. As a result, his father…how can I put it…was peeved; pissed; got his panties in a wad; went agro; was butt-hurt…you get the picture, it was ugly. Though, he wasn’t upset with the leasing manager; He was livid with my son.

Each day this week, my ex- ramped up his threats and disparaging language to Offspring #2 about how badly he had screwed up. I sat down with my son and reminded him: No one died; No one is in jail; You didn’t lose an appendage; It’s only money. Then, as my grown son looked at me with the “What am I gonna do, Mom?” look in his eyes, I made a plan…

Little known fact about me: When I want something badly enough, I will get it. When I need to understand how something works, I will read every piece of information on it that I can find. When I want to take a trip, I will go alone if I have to. When I’m worried about where the boys are and haven’t heard from them, I will track their phones via GPS and Verizon. This, is the mode I went into.

I called a corporate attorney who gave me the name of a friend who is real estate attorney. It was after hours, so I left a voicemail and then obtained his email address and fax number from his website. We crafted a letter detailing what happened and emailed our intent to break the lease to the leasing manager and the attorney. We then faxed the same. We spent the evening researching lease law, and right of rescission. My son looked at me like I had all of life’s answers. Not because I fixed anything that night, but because I was on his side.

When I went to bed that night, and for many nights after, I prayed Exodus 14:14. The LORD will fight for you; you need only to be still. I chanted the verse over and over and over. Then, my OCD kicked in... So Lord, when you say you’ll fight, like, what does that mean? Who exactly are you going to fight? And what does a fight with the Lord Almighty look like anyhow? Will the outcome be the one that I want? Are you really fighting for ME as scripture says? And what if the outcome is different from what I want? Will you put a muzzle on my ex- please? And just what do you mean “you only need to be still?” I mean, I’m laying here in bed trying to sleep- doesn’t get much more still than that. I don’t think I can still my heart or mind because I don’t yet understand your “fight” comment. Could you just explain all this to me? Maybe over Starbucks in the morning?? Needless to say, it was a sleepless night.

The next morning my son asks me how I think things are going to work out. I tell him I’ll call the leasing office and the attorney today. He asks what I think the percentage is that this will all be okay. I say I think it will all be fine. He sighs with relief. Though I have no crystal ball, he is calmed by my willingness to fight for him.

Okay, now I understand the scripture…